Friday, October 6, 2017

Lately: decisions made

Shortly after my last post, I talked with my surgeon on the phone and booked to operate on my ankle. Shortly after that I was started to miss day after day of planting in interior BC. Looking back it was comical how much pain I was in, but I can be very determined. I quit planting 5-6 weeks before I was supposed to. A & G reforestation was very accommodating of my injury. They are a prime example of professionalism in the reforestation industry. I spent two months after that living at home in the city. I now regret how complacent I was in that period. Anticipation of school doesn't qualify as action.

Right when I decided to get surgery I got accepted into Carleton University in Ottawa. I had applied to the Industrial Design school there in January 2017 because I had a hunch my ankle wasn't going to heal on it's own. ID schools study the process of design for mass produced goods. This field reflects my obsession with tinkering and my passion for aesthetics. Studying ID also meant I could design products for the ski industry. Previously, I never wanted to be involved in the ski industry as anything other than an athlete, but making ski products seems so god damn cool. In addition, my previous experience skiing is a valuable asset. The decision to go to school seemed obvious in light of the surgery as I wouldn't be skiing 2017/18 regardless.

Upon arrival in Ottawa I realized how my priorities have shifted the last few years. I don't know if this is what I want to do. I might be bound to the wild, at least for one more year. Focusing on school though. After surgery I'll be training to plant trees and ski, while finishing my second semester. Right now I can walk, but not much else. I've improved my diet and I stretch daily.

It looks like my ankle is basically still broken from sept. 2016, but a lot of terms are being thrown around. My surgeon is going to fill that fracture up with a substance that induces healing. I totally lucked out and have what seems to be the best ankle surgeon in Western Canada. I don't know what the recovery time is going to be. School's ok though. I love my apartment and Carleton has the inverse of the guy/girl ratio of the ski towns that I'm used to. I've always tried to learn one new word a day and holy shit is that ever happening now!

MRI from early May revealing that I had been trying to ski on a more or less broken ankle all season.

This blog is about skiing but also, my life. I feel the need to write the following.

My mom died suddenly from an aneurysm a little more than a year ago, which was a big catalyst for change. I loved my mom very much. Barbara was the most giving person I knew. The death may have been why I ultimately made the call to go to school. My dad, brother, and I are getting closer. Who knows where we're at. One foot in denial and the other stepping towards better days, probably. Thanks to everyone who supported us since then, especially those grieving themselves. I wish this never happened but adversity is an irreplaceable education. It's made me a stronger and maybe even better person.

I had some good times with friends last year but other than that it fucking sucked. My half season of skiing was painful, I could barely plant, I was smoking weed constantly, and I had to push through heartbreak (not going there). I think I'm starting to be able to cope with reality. I quit weed again. It's something I've wanted out of my life for the last few years but haven't had the guts to face life sober. Things are really fucking clear without it, more than I even like.

So there's that.

77 more days until surgery. Study, stretch, think about skiing.

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